By Karen Galarpe
These days I'm feeling the pain of a couple of friends who are both going through something hard -- something that hits the core, the love life kind of pain.
The most I could do is listen and pray.
A few years back, another friend opened up to me and with tears asked me, "How do you know he's the one?"
Well how do you answer that?
When I was so much younger I asked this too of someone more mature than me. And she said if you have to ask that, then chances are he's not the one. Because if he's the one, you would know.
There are some couples, who when you see them, they just seem so right for each other. They're a good fit, they complement each other, and they're so happy to know they're meant for each other. It's a joy coming from deep within.
Some of these couples are our pastor Peter Tan-Chi and his wife Deonna (authors of the book "Motivate"), their daughter Joy Tan-Chi Mendoza and her husband Edric Mendoza, and our pastor Dr. Alex Marcos and his wife Dr. May Marcos.
Two of my friends have also found the one for them. I asked them how they met and how they knew the other was the one. Maybe this can help point you to the right direction.
Met at McDonald's
Vie Lising-Velasco is a ballet teacher. She is married to Rene. Let's hear it straight from Vie:
"Back in the day when McDonald's was at its peak in hiring college students, I was summoned three times for interviews and got the job! That was where I met my now-husband Rene. According to him, it was never the same after he saw me. I detected by his actions that he wanted to court me. I hesitated because in my heart I was not sure if he was the right man for me.
"After around a total of six hours of intermittent conversations, he mentioned that he is a Christian. He was exhilarated to know that I, too, am a follower of Christ.
"During our four-year boyfriend and girlfriend relationship, we broke up twice. My mother would call Rene and ask him to reconcile with me. Now that I am reminiscing that God-sent moment, I realize that God can use parents to make His will known.
"Through all the circumstances that God orchestrated plus Rene showing the fruit of the Holy Spirit of what a Christian should be, I knew he was the one.
"We celebrated our 27th wedding anniversary last July. Every year, our three wonderful daughters would always come up with something on our wedding anniversary!"
Youth pastor to husband
Anna Carlos-Alegre is an educator. She is married to Venjoy. Here's Anna in her own words:
"My story may be unique, but I think it is the best way to find your forever! My husband was my youth pastor, my mentor, and eventually, became my best friend and confidant. For 15 years! That is probably the most unique part of our story.
"To condense the impressions that God made in my heart over that span of 15 years (met him when I was 16), he was my best friend -- he knew me inside out. He was selfless; he saw me through my string of "love lives" and broken hearts (because he was my confidant), and always gave good advice -- that wasn't necessarily favorable towards him.
"He also said, 'You need me!' as he made his love known, and in my youthful proud heart, I tried proving to him that I did not. He was loving enough to confront me when I was wrong, and he did it gently. And despite the happiest romances I had over those years, I always felt like he was home.
"When I lost him to the US and silence for 4 years, that was when I knew that he was the one that this phrase embodied: 'Don't marry the one you can live with. Marry the one you feel you cannot live without.' He was right and I had to humble myself!"
So there. If it is God's will for you to marry, He knows best. Seek His guidance and trust Him.
VERSE OF THE WEEK: Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand. Proverbs 19:21
BOOK OF THE WEEK: There are two kinds of leaders: the self-serving leader and the servant leader. Which one are you? According to The Servant Leader by Ken Blanchard, the self-serving leader spends most of his time protecting his status. Feedback is thus received negatively. The servant leader, on the other hand, views leadership as an act of service. He embraces feedback and sees it as a way to improve and provide even better service. To be an effective leader, you have to start with the heart.