Life lessons

In a few hours, the new year, 2019, will ring in. Looking at my planner this year, I can't help but be amazed at how fast time flies. So many things happened this year, 2018. New friends were made, old friends found again, and wonderful moments were spent with loved ones.

One of the lessons I have learned and am still learning this year is the need to make time to rest. Rest is good. Rest is refreshing. Rest is a must.

One of the country's most successful businessmen, John Gokongwei, Jr., apparently makes sure to take care of himself well. He takes hour-long power naps after lunch. He also exercises every day and is always home for dinner. More of his life lessons are in the book "Lessons from Dad, John Gokongwei, Jr." by Lance Gokongwei with Yvette Fernandez -- a little book worth reading.

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One of the best reads I had this year is this little book I swiped off my dad's table: "Lessons from Dad, John Gokongwei, Jr." by Lance Gokongwei with Yvette Fernandez. You can finish reading it in less than an hour, but it's filled with wise advice practiced by Gokongwei himself covering family, work, living. Some of the lessons he lived and shared: Spend as much time as you can with your family; It is never too late to get an education; Find your passion; Live simply; Pray. #karensbookoftheweek #lessonsfromdadjohngokongweijr #bookstagram #lancegokongwei #johngokongweijr

A post shared by Karen Galarpe (@kgalarpe) on Dec 31, 2018 at 1:13am PST

What has this year taught you? May we all take stock to look back at what we have learned and ought to learn some more, and thank God for His blessings. Happy new year!

BOOK OF THE WEEK: I finally finished Nick Joaquin's "A Question of Heroes" which casts a critical eye on our history. Heneral Antonio Luna, Emilio Aguinaldo, Apolinario Mabini, Jose Rizal, and Andres Bonifacio, among others, come alive in this book and you come away feeling that history would have turned out differently had cooler heads prevailed.

VERSE OF THE WEEK: You will go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and hills will burst into song before you, and all the trees of the field will clap their hands. Isaiah 55:12

Nakikiprobinsiya

"Be my laydeh..." Martin Nievera crooned as I entered the bus, this first bus I saw with a "Dau" sign on the dashboard, on EDSA near Munoz Market.

"Comfort me through all the pain and be my laydeh..." Martin seemed to serenade me as I plopped on a seat I had all to myself. It's almost the same. Like being transported back in time, I told myself, as I surveyed the inside of this generic bus I can't even remember the name of.

Red curtains shielded us passengers from the sun's harsh rays. Backpacks and plastic bags were stacked overhead. The seats were covered in plastic. There was a TV overhead behind the driver, but it was turned off. The bus smelled old. The word 'kitsch' stuck in my head.

Then came Ric Segreto singing "Lovin' you oh-oh is such an easy thing to do..." and I relaxed. I've been through this before, something like more than 20 years ago, on a bus on the way out of Metro Manila with 80s music from cassette tapes. I was on one of my "nakikiprobinsiya" trips back then, like now.

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A Pinoy diaspora Christmas

It's three days before Christmas, but our home here in Manila is quiet. We don't even have a Christmas tree or a belen, although we do have some Christmas stockings up. There are no gifts in the living room, and no one's in a frenzied hurry to wrap Christmas gifts. Oh we know Christmas is this weekend already, but somehow we're just ... quiet about it. You see, tomorrow, half of the family will fly out from Manila to Japan to meet one-fourth of the family based there, and one-eighth of the family will fly out from the US, where they are based, to Japan for the same holiday reunion.

Meanwhile, half of those based in Manila will be staying put in the city, but we still had to convince half of that half –one-fourth–to come over on Christmas Eve instead of just staying at their home like they were planning to do.

As for the remaining one-eighth of the family, they'll stay in the US and connect with the rest of us–in Manila and Japan–via Facetime.

It's not always like this though. Most of the time, my two siblings based abroad would come to Manila, leaving behind their own families, to spend Christmas here with my parents, my sister, me, and our own families. As they would say–and other Filipinos abroad no doubt would, too–iba pa rin ang Pasko sa Pilipinas.

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A non-Thai relaxing massage in Thailand

They say you haven't been to Thailand if you haven't seen the reclining Buddha (Wat Po), got on a boat on the Chao Praya River, bargained in the night markets, rode the tuktuk, and had a Thai massage.

Well, in the 3 visits to Thailand I have made over the years, I've done them all, except for the Thai massage.

This year, I got the closest thing to it, though--a non-Thai massage. It was an hour-long aromatherapy massage which was so relaxing and memorable, I would have had it again the next day, and the day after that, or every day even, if it were possible.

Our hosts, the amiable people of Goodyear who were launching new tires then, billeted us members of the press at the Sheraton Hua Hin Resort and Spa, a beachside place by the Gulf of Thailand, some 3 hours away from Bangkok.

It was a wonderful resort hotel, with the cool waters of the swimming pool winding around the villas leading down to the infinity pool a few meters away from the beach. The casitas with their red cushions strategically placed around the pools looked so inviting for those who want to lounge around, curl up with a book, and sip a refreshing drink in between dips to the pool.

 Sheraton Hua Hin Resort and Spa. Photo by Karen Galarpe

Our hosts asked the 4 of us from the Philippine press if, after the event at the racetrack that day, we wanted to have a massage at the resort hotel's Aspadeva Spa or go to the night market. We chose the massage.

So on our 2nd night, we were booked for massage service at 9 p.m. The spa receptionist had a message for us: eat light for dinner. So I just had caesar salad and fish fillet from the buffet table at the resort hotel's Black Restaurant.

It was there that a Goodyear executive, about to have his dinner, warned us not to get the Thai massage as it turned out to be more uncomfortable and a bit painful than relaxing for him. And so when we trooped to Aspadeva Spa from Black Restaurant, we said we're having the Aroma Fusion Massage (2,100 baht), not the Thai massage, for 60 minutes.

The gracious lady at the reception area gave us a choice of massage oil, letting us get a whiff of three kinds of massage oil. One was lavender, which was calming, another was lemon, I think, and then orange. We all chose orange.

My massage therapist, Wen, led me to a private massage suite which had its own changing room with a dresser. A couple of red silk robes, disposable underwear, and slippers were ready.

Wen then got a basin with warm water, and bathed my feet in it while I sipped cold lemongrass tea. She asked me where I was from, and when I said Philippines, she said people from the Philippines are friendly. Then I got on the massage table face down, and found myself looking at a bowl of floating flowers placed strategically in my line of sight.

I told Wen what I like: hard strokes on the upper back, light massage on the legs, hard strokes on the soles of my feet. She would ask often if the pressure was okay.

I felt the hard knots on my upper back being loosened, the tension being addressed. Ah, This is what massage is all about, I thought. It's healing those aches and pains. It was so good I didn't want it to end.

But it had to, after 60 minutes. Back at the reception area, we were given hot ginger tea and a warm face towel. And as we sipped our tea, we all had smiles on our faces. We may not have been yanked and twisted away here and there via a traditional Thai massage right in the heart of Thailand, but it was such a great way to end the night. Can't wait to have such an experience again.

BOOK OF THE WEEK: Four years ago, my friend Richelle gave me the slim book Handle With Prayer by Charles Stanley. It took a long while before I got to read it finally recently, but I felt it was the right time. It tackles topics such as why our prayers are not answered, how to pray in the will of God, fasting, and praying for others. A book certainly worth reading.

VERSE OF THE WEEK: "Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days." Psalm 90:14

Zip lining at 80

Can't resist posting this photo here. That's my mom on the left, at 80 years old, on a zip line last month at the Picnic Grove in Tagaytay. Beside her is her friend.

Imagine that! What do you think you'll be doing at 80? Would we still be alive when we reach 80? :D

So whatever's on your bucket list, go for it! Enjoy life, but stay safe!

BOOK OF THE WEEK: I finished reading yesterday Just As I Am, the autobiography of world renowned preacher Billy Graham. The thick hardbound book cost me only P75 after my friend Tinna decided to let go of some of her books. :-) From milking cows daily, Graham has gone on to inspire millions of people all over the world to make peace with God. His message still holds true today: that God loves us and has great plans for us, but sin got in the way. We can't atone for our sins because of our sinful nature. God therefore sent His only Son, Jesus Christ to take our place on the cross and wipe our sins away. But though He did it for mankind, we have to take that gift individually and open our hearts to Christ. It is interesting to read Graham's stories of the people he has met over the years and how God has guided him.

VERSE OF THE WEEK: "For the LORD gives wisdom, and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding." ~ Proverbs 2:6

The sweetness of pasalubong

On a media trip to Thailand last week, my fellow journalists and I made a beeline for the duty-free shops at the airport with less than an hour left before boarding time. Our agenda: buy homecoming gifts or pasalubong. We bought chocolates, tamarind candies, mango in sticky rice, and Thai curry in a box and headed to the gate with our loot.

Looking around, I see that rare is the Filipino who doesn't buy pasalubong for folks back home. It's more of an unwritten rule and a custom to bring home a souvenir for those who weren't with us on the trip, in effect saying, “Wish you were with me” or “Thinking of you” or “Here's a little gift to show you I care.”

It's not really the grandness of the gift that matters, rather the thought that counts, and so little pasalubong items from chocolates to little trinkets are welcomed. This is an expression of the love language of gifts. In “The Five Love Languages of Teenagers”, author Gary Chapman writes, “Gifts are visible, tangible evidence of emotional love.”

My sister remembers hugging and carrying this big white stuffed bear on the plane back home to give to her kids. A friend of mine brought home in his hand luggage two heavy little sculptures from Bangkok to give to friends. And I remember checking out maybe about three stores in Akihabara in Tokyo looking for a specific anime action figure for my son.

There’s satisfaction in buying something for a loved one, or people you care about, and handing this over personally upon arrival from a trip. The smile on the recipients’ faces is worth it.

Traveling soon? Make room then for some strawberry jam and peanut brittle from Baguio, otap and danggitfrom Cebu, green tea from Japan, coffee from Seattle, wine from California, chocolates from Switzerland, tea from China, and yes, why not—some crocodile jerky from Australia. If it fits in the bag, it’s great pasalubong. Have a safe trip!

Click here to read this article on the Smart Super Women blog.

BOOK OF THE WEEK: Walking from East to West is the autobiography of preacher Ravi Zacharias (written with R. S. B. Sawyer). It's interesting to "walk" with the well-known teacher as he recounts his life growing up in India, where he thought he was born to be mediocre. He reached the depths of despair and even tried ending his life. But Zacharias found new life in Christ, and since then, his life turned around completely. From India, he lived in Canada, and now he is a popular preacher based in Atlanta. Sad that I missed listening to him when he was in Manila for a speaking engagement a few years ago. Anyway, got the book from the bargain bin of OMF Lit shop at Il Terrazo on Tomas Morato Avenue Extension in Quezon City for a huge discount (from P250, it was down to P75) during the last sale! Worth it.

VERSE OF THE WEEK: "Do not fret because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away" ~ Psalm 37:1-2

Grateful

I am grateful to God for all His blessings in 2010...Even if my left side mirror was stolen last night on New Year's eve, nothing else was stolen...Even if my right rear tire got punctured last week, it wasn't deep...Even if I'm stuck home today and can't go out of town, I have my family with me...Even if I can't afford some wants, I have what I need...Even if I wasn't able to see all my close friends over the holidays, they're still there as our friendships run deep...Even if I feel tired, I am happy. Thank you, Lord for the gift of life. I'm looking forward to what You have in store for me this 2011. :)

BOOK OF THE WEEK: When I read my friend Mae's review of "Ang Pera na Hindi Bitin" by Eduardo "Ardy" Roberto, I got intrigued and looked out for it. I found it in PowerBooks and snapped up copies for me and my friends. This little book gives practical wise advice on handling money wisely and stretching it so it goes farther -- Hindi bitin. A great investment!

VERSE OF THE WEEK: Teach us to number our days aright that we may gain a heart of wisdom. Psalm 90:12

Surviving Christmas

Is it really true? Did that Countdown to Christmas counter I see whenever I go to the food court 5 times a week at the office turn 24 today? Wasn't that just 80 or 79 when they first put it up?

That means there are just 24 days left until Christmas.

And that means there are just 3 weeks left to do all the shopping and partying and the working in between before that happy day.

That means I better be on survival mode already.

I remember past Christmas seasons when things were just a tad too hectic.

I got sick one time with colds for 3 weeks and my ears were so clogged I couldn't hear in one ear. I finally went to see a doctor on the morning of December 24, finally convinced I needed some serious help.

Then there was a Christmas season full of deadlines that I was interviewing someone on the morning of December 26. My desperate tone convinced my interviewee to meet me the day after Christmas.

There was just no time to shop one holiday season that I ended up at the mall--and braving the crowd--on the morning of December 24 to finish shopping for my loved ones.

And then I remember a time I felt like Elastigirl being pulled this way and that to drive, pick up, deliver, fetch someone or something, and watch a program and attend a party in between.

Well. Never again.

I've since wisened up, I'd like to believe.

And so here are some strategies I have employed since then to help me survive the Christmas season sans stress and sickness:

1. Calendar everything, be it deadline, press con, interview, meeting, program, party, lunch date, Bible study meeting, family affair, and so on.

Putting everything down in a month-in-a-glance calendar will help you see if you're committing yourself to too many things.

So far, my December calendar is pretty much OK, with just one party a week scheduled.

2. Don't say yes to every invitation. Yes it's nice and fun to attend every party you're invited to, but with city traffic at its worst at this time of the year, it makes sense to be more choosy. Don't worry. You can meet other friends next year.

Just this morning, for instance, my friend Meg said that with her schedule, it looks like we won't be able to see each other until next year. But she assured me that I won't miss her as she will be sending me some food when I go to work on Christmas Day (yes, I think I have work at the newsroom then).

3. Shop a little at a time as often as you can. Some years back, I did all my Christmas shopping in 1-2 days at the mall. While that would be ideal so one can save on transpo cost, it may not be practical if you don't have much time.

So last year I started shopping early (as early as September) a little at a time. Every time I was at the mall for something, I picked up one or 2 gifts for the holidays. It was also more relaxing as I had the luxury of choosing something that would suit the recipient more.

With that strategy, I was done with shopping by the 2nd week of December.

4. Try shopping online. I like checking out online stores since you're more likely to find unique items you can't find in big stores at the malls. I also like to support budding entrepreneurs (there are many of them on Multiply) so I buy online. Payment is via bank deposit, G-cash, or meet up and they deliver the goods to your house via courier if you aren't meeting up.

A word of caution though: Buy only from established online sellers or those with good feedback.

5. Get plenty of rest. If you do number 2 above, you'll have enough time for rest. Sleep on time, get enough sleep, and make room for some "me" time to recharge.

6. Take your vitamins and eat and drink healthy. Boost your immune system by treating your body well. And while we're at it, make sure you exercise regularly, even if it's just for 30 minutes.

7. Remember what it's all about. We have Christmas because it's Jesus' birthday. And how can one attend a birthday celebration without greeting the celebrant? So make time to pray.

Besides, taking the time to pray can help you put everything in the proper perspective, letting you see what really matters in life.

So there you have it, my 7 survival tactics for the hectic holiday season. Merry Christmas!

BOOK OF THE WEEK: It's not at all Christmas-y, but the book I've been lugging around lately is Beyond Belief: Islamic Excursions Among the Converted Peoples by V.S. Naipul. What made me pick up the book at a secondhand book store recently is Naipul's name and the "Winner of the Nobel Prize for Literature" text on the front cover. In this book, Naipul revisits the places he has visited before for his book Among the Believers: Indonesia, Iran, Pakistan, and Malaysia. Through his profiles of real people, readers get to see what life is like for Muslims in those areas.

VERSE OF THE WEEK: ...He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Philippians 1:6